Written by, Susan C.
I didn’t know what trust was when I got into recovery. I had no faith. Pot had been my higher power for more than 15 years. When people said their higher power was keeping them clean and sober, I was confused. How come I used so much longer than I wanted to? People who had a higher power seemed happy, so I acted as if I had one until one day I didn’t feel alone. It was a slow process to create a relationship with a higher power of my own understanding. If I trust my higher power cares for me, and I have faith that I’m not alone, I can listen to hear my higher power. That is how my higher power can keep me clean and sober: if I listen and stay connected. Once the fog lifted, I now have access to the sunlight of the spirit. I used to think that once I was connected I always would be. But I’ve discovered that faith, like everything else, comes and goes. Now I don’t fret so much when I feel disconnected. I try to remember that I AM always connected to the universal web of life and love. Being human I will forget, and then I’ll remember again. That’s a really good reason to keep coming to meetings.
