“As we loosen our grip on the reins of our lives, we find we are being led, slowly and certainly, in the right direction—towards home.”

– Life with Hope, second edition, page 57

I was forced to let go of the reins of my life. This program did not allow me to keep holding on the way I was while I lived in active addiction. In order to take the Twelve Steps, I had to let go absolutely to find home and serenity within myself. Once I learned to let go, I found I was being guided by my Higher Power and each time that I let go, I was guided further.

I lost my job during the pandemic of 2020 and after two days of crying and screaming at myself, I finally picked up the 800-pound phone. The fellow I called told me the job that I was now searching for was also searching for me. It was a true God shot. I had not thought of looking for work in this way. I looked at employment like it was a prize to be won. The fellow made me realize my place of employment will be just as lucky to have me as I am to have them.

God is leading me in the right direction when I pray. Every night I pray for God to guide me; to guide my actions, my voice, my thoughts and feelings. I meditate on the here and now. It is the most blissful part of my day. Sometimes I receive answers from my Higher Power during my meditation that I am truly blessed to know. Finding a job isn’t easy. I will take many steps in order to find the right fit. I have faith that God is on my side and is looking out for me with every step I take.

Final thought: Today, meditation and prayer are an everyday regimen that saves me from catastrophizing and brings me peace.