“Learning to live by faith took practice; it opened the way to a new reliance on a Higher Power and the restoration of our inner wisdom. The turning point for us was the decision to relinquish control.”

– Life with Hope, third edition, page 13

When I started my recovery I was sure that I could do this by myself. I was a strong, smart, and intelligent person; this wouldn’t be too hard; all I had was a problem with smoking marijuana. I didn’t have much faith in these Steps or trust in a sponsor. Yet, I kept slipping and relapsing and my life was more unmanageable than ever before.

Finally, I had to admit that I didn’t know much about recovery and I couldn’t do this by myself. I had to finally get honest, and try turning my will over to a power greater than myself however I choose to visualize it. The more I practice this tool of recovery, the more I have faith that this is working better than my way of doing it.

I’ve heard it said that my will is what I “want” to do, and God’s will is what I “need” to do. Time and time again things that used to baffle me became easier to manage. The choices I started to make were no longer based on self-will but on how I could be helpful to others. When I stopped trying to drive the bus, I started to enjoy the ride.

Final thought: Today, I place my faith in the program of recovery and in the hands of my Higher Power.