“Speaking frankly about ourselves to our Higher Power and another human being expanded our self-knowledge, and relieved us of the burden of our past. A sense of belonging began to grow in us.”

– Life with Hope, second edition, page 23

At first, the thought of taking my Fifth Step was terrifying. The idea of telling another person my deepest darkest secrets and revealing my soul was simply unimaginable; however, it was a necessary action to be taken immediately after completing my Fourth Step. Together, my sponsor and I took some deep breaths and said a prayer to invite my Higher Power. I began to relax enough to start reading my Fourth Step. As I spoke and she listened, the exact nature of my wrongs began to emerge. My behavior patterns and character defects clearly presented themselves. I was no longer terrified nor scared to face my true nature.

The amazing thing was that I no longer felt all alone and even began to feel like I belonged. I began to believe that my life was part of something bigger than myself. Sharing what I was so afraid to face with another human being actually changed my life. Learning to trust my Higher Power relieved my mind and provided a sense of belonging. I was now free to be myself for the first time in my life. My life began to get better, even beyond my wildest dreams.

During my addiction to marijuana and other mind-altering drugs, I had been so ashamed, embarrassed and uncomfortable in my own skin. I found peace, acceptance and relief in completing my Fifth Step. Now, I could move on with my Step work. I could grow up, be a productive member of society and even be happy, joyous, and free.

Final thought: Today, I wake up and ask, “How can I serve? What can I do for myself and others?” This is a far cry from the days when all that mattered was where I could find another joint.