Gripped by Green

Written by, Amy K.

Chaos crowned my childhood years,
a crown of grief, a flood of tears.
Mum was gone before I knew
how fragile love, how brief, how true.

At eight, the world was cracked and cold,
foster hands, but none to hold.
Brother lost to darker fires,
needles, powders, failed desires.

I found my comfort in the haze,
at twelve years old, those smoky days.
Dizzy first, yet I returned—
a gentler burn than life had burned.

Seasons passed, the habit grew,
a daily cloud, my skyless view.
Not for laughter, not for play—
but just to make it through the day.

Now laundry towers, dishes wait,
three small souls, their futures fate.
Lunchboxes packed with shaking hands,
while I am trapped in sinking sands.

The smoke that once could soothe my pain
has bound me fast, a rusted chain.
I long to breathe, to stand, be free,
to find the woman lost in me.

And deep inside, a voice still calls,
beyond these weary, smoky walls.
A spark survives, it will not die—
a seed of hope, a clearer sky.

One day I’ll break these binding ties,
lift my head and meet sunrise.
My children’s laughter guiding me,
toward the life I’m meant to see.

Published in A New Leaf – February 2026

  • Heard in a Meeting

    “For a long time, I thought I was consuming cannabis, but then I realized, cannabis was actually consuming me…” – Anonymous Published in A New Leaf – April 2025

    Heard in a Meeting
  • Osmosis!

    By John J. of District 19 You wanna fight crime in a skintight suitYou wanna stop time and detect the truthYou wanna ray gun, wanna turn to stoneYou wanna be the one who saves the universe aloneYou wanna be fast like MercuryTravel to the past and fix historyYou wanna jump buildings, you wanna bend barsSee…

    Osmosis!
  • Liking How You’re Living

    By Rich G. There’s a sudden and half-expectedhit of joy that comes with it—a familiar jolt in the heart’s funny boneletting you know you’re back to bumping along the right corridor.Sure, there’s room for improvement,many rooms, in fact,unused in the sprawlingmansion of your remaining days,waiting in furnished gloomfor a bruising to flay its ripened dust. Published in A…

    Liking How You’re Living
  • Break Up Letter

    By Jules M. of District 20 Dear Mary Jane, When I discovered you, it was like a miracle had come into my life. You gave me the ability to hyperfocus, to briefly let the troubling world slip away, to access my creativity, to be more social, to practice yoga and meditation, made experiences more enjoyable…

    Break Up Letter
  • Dakaholic in New Zealand

    By Bern G. My name is Bern, I am a marijuana addict. I was born in a small town in the central North Island of New Zealand (NZ). Looking back it was an area that was beautiful to grow up in, especially when I consider where others must grow up. My parents were role models…

    Dakaholic in New Zealand
  • Break Up Letter

    By Jamie L. Mary Jane, It is without regret that I have decided to sever our dysfunctional relationship. We have been an item for 17,520 days, most of which I do not remember, all of which has been a waste of time. You have tried for years to break me, to destroy me, to drag…

    Break Up Letter