“We made amends even to those who had harmed us more than we had harmed them, regardless of whether they reciprocated.”

– Life with Hope, third edition, page 44

I had enough resentments to fill a swimming pool and just floated in them until I became all withered and soggy. I hung on to those because they justified my anger and made me feel superior to those who I felt had wronged me. I remember doing my first Fourth Step inventory and I kept saying, “but they…” My sponsor stopped me and said, “this inventory is not about them, it is about you and what you did. You have to take care of your side of the street.”

It was humbling to let go of those resentments and look at what I had done in those relationships. I realized that to fix this, I had to make the amends for what I had done without mentioning the resentments and the wrongs that I felt were done to me. Once I was willing to discuss only my part, I found that I was able to mend many of the relationships that had gone wrong. Also I found that some of them were willing to take on their part in the situation and we could move forward as better friends.

Final thought: Today, I accept that my life is the way that it is because of the choices I have made, and I must be willing to take responsibility for what I do and say.