“I was told that you can’t think yourself into the right actions, you have to act your way into the right thinking…”
– My Best Thinking Got Me Here, Life with Hope, second edition, page 176
The phrase “fake it until you make it” sums up so much of my experience in recovery. Just because I got clean and sober doesn’t mean that my disordered attitude, thoughts, or behavior have automatically been transformed. There are many days when I don’t want to pray, I don’t want to go to a meeting, and I don’t want to check in with my sponsor or another fellow. There are moments when I find myself consumed by much of the same negative self-talk that drove me to escape with marijuana for so many years; however, my thoughts don’t have to dictate my actions.
I have learned in recovery to pause, breathe, and do the next right thing. I try to act “as if’’ I am already the person I would like to be and trust that where my body goes, my mind will follow. I may not ever rid myself of my “stinking thinking,” but I sure don’t have to listen to it. Because of the fellowship, I can recognize my overwhelming feelings, accept them for what they are, and make more effective decisions for navigating them.
Final thought: Today, I will act “as if” I’m already the person I would like to be by doing the next right thing. When I am not sure what to do, I will lean on the fellowship.
